How to be unforgettable. Tell this story: “The other day, I was reading about the formation of memories on a website. The proposition they made was that strong memories are triggered by an evolutionary instinct to remember painful events, especially, as to not repeat them. This they tied to adrenaline, as that is released during stressful, painful, events and made the assertion that it was that adrenaline that made for the emotional impact of the moment by making a larger biochemical map of the moment in the memory. Adrenaline is also released as a response to pleasure, to encourage us to seek those actions, in smaller quantities that leave the memories strong but not dominate the way that fearful ones are. The evolutionary instinct always skews toward survival first. The article went on to talk about Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, the manifestation of memories formed under such high adrenaline levels that the remembering of them re-triggered adrenaline, re-enforcing the memory and the trauma. These memories became monsters in their minds that they would do anything not to confront. What struck me as odd, as I read this article, is those moments lasted only seconds from a person’s life, far less than many pleasurable moments in that same life but became so disproportionate because of a biochemical instinctual response. I thought about my own memories and realized how true this was. It then occurred to me that everyone must have some trauma that forms the backdrop their psyche and it’s unfortunate that we can’t stand with each other before that monster that exists only in our own minds. I wouldn’t be afraid because I know your monster isn’t real. Would you be afraid of mine?” The point of the exercise is as you are speaking their minds are perhaps wandering to that memory, or perhaps will wander there later, and as the monster emerges, you are standing there with them, unafraid, telling them it’s not real. The only thing that’s more unforgettable than pain is the person that removes it. (I once heard you mention that you had a relative that stepped on a landmine, suffered such a trauma, and I know that you wish you had been there to comfort them. Perhaps this would help.) All the Best, TVA
"So, Erin, at last we meet..."
Saturday, April 28, 2012
How to be unforgettable.
How to be unforgettable. Tell this story: “The other day, I was reading about the formation of memories on a website. The proposition they made was that strong memories are triggered by an evolutionary instinct to remember painful events, especially, as to not repeat them. This they tied to adrenaline, as that is released during stressful, painful, events and made the assertion that it was that adrenaline that made for the emotional impact of the moment by making a larger biochemical map of the moment in the memory. Adrenaline is also released as a response to pleasure, to encourage us to seek those actions, in smaller quantities that leave the memories strong but not dominate the way that fearful ones are. The evolutionary instinct always skews toward survival first. The article went on to talk about Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, the manifestation of memories formed under such high adrenaline levels that the remembering of them re-triggered adrenaline, re-enforcing the memory and the trauma. These memories became monsters in their minds that they would do anything not to confront. What struck me as odd, as I read this article, is those moments lasted only seconds from a person’s life, far less than many pleasurable moments in that same life but became so disproportionate because of a biochemical instinctual response. I thought about my own memories and realized how true this was. It then occurred to me that everyone must have some trauma that forms the backdrop their psyche and it’s unfortunate that we can’t stand with each other before that monster that exists only in our own minds. I wouldn’t be afraid because I know your monster isn’t real. Would you be afraid of mine?” The point of the exercise is as you are speaking their minds are perhaps wandering to that memory, or perhaps will wander there later, and as the monster emerges, you are standing there with them, unafraid, telling them it’s not real. The only thing that’s more unforgettable than pain is the person that removes it. (I once heard you mention that you had a relative that stepped on a landmine, suffered such a trauma, and I know that you wish you had been there to comfort them. Perhaps this would help.) All the Best, TVA
